You have a sketch. You love the sketch. You finalize your layout and transfer it to you painting surface of choice. You stare at the blank, colorless sketch, seeing all the colors flowing onto the page into what you want (and hope) it to be. It's time to lay the brush to the surface... But what's stopping you?
Oh my god, I'm going to ruin it.
Watercolors aren't as forgiving as acrylics or oils. Digital media of course is impossible to screw up. (What I would give for a Ctrl+Z in real life.) With watercolors, you can't just paint over it if your colors are not right. You can't just paint it back to white and start over again. You get one shot to make it right. Just one. Then there is a fear that perhaps the paper might be one in a hundred that malfunctions on you, bubbles up when the water touches the surface. There's a chance you may accidentally paint over something, and forget that element was there, and there is no option to paint over it again. Watercolors are by far, to me, the most intimidating media ever. I do not think twice when I mix up some acrylics and throw it on a canvas. I think eh, if it's not right, just paint over it, it will be dry in no time in order to correct. Watercolors are notorious for holding grudges against you and your mistakes.
Even though I have done this a hundred times, stared at the blank paper hundreds of times and telling myself exactly the same thing... Just do it, don't worry, it will be fine. All you have to do is get started with one tiny area, and the rest will flow and it will turn out as gorgeous as you had hoped for.... Each time I have a new painting to be filled in, I stare at the white-ness of the board and procrastinate for as long as I can, even when I get right down to the nitty gritty of cleaning up my palette and preparing to dip that brush into the paint and push it around.
What stops me? What is this irrational fear that I'm going to make it look horrible? I know that I am not the greatest artist in the world, but I would consider myself a fairly mediocre type. Some tell me that my skills match such great artists that I follow--This I'm not sure of. I don't think any artist would measure themselves against someone's art that they love. "She'll always be better than me." So why is this blank board so intimidating? Ever since I began this sketch, I loved the way it looked. I thought and thought and thought about color schemes, details, textures and lighting. In my head it is already painted. But putting that brush down is the first step; you have to take a leap of faith with yourself, I suppose.
This immense pressure comes from one particular painting, which I am at the "intimidation stage" as I have decided to call it, in which I am determined to make it the most beautiful and amazing thing I have ever painted. The reasoning is that it is for someone very special, who I hope to make gasp and stagger with it's awesomeness. This adds a thousand more pounds of pressure to the already daunting task at hand.
And yet, I have to have that faith in myself to get started, and know that I can and I will produce something great.
Now I'm ready to give life to that empty white sketch.
...Now if only I weren't at work right now and could sit right down to paint.
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